Home AboutArchivesBest Of Subscribe

“Two dead, twenty-five to go…”

TV Comedy

Last year, I took a look at the origin story of Fawlty Towers, and poked at it with an extremely large stick. I like poking stock opinions and anecdotes with extremely large sticks. It makes me very excited.

So, let’s do it again – although don’t worry, I promise this one won’t take four damn articles. This time round, we’re going to examine the inspiration behind the episode “The Kipper and the Corpse”; a story often told by Cleese. The most complete version I’ve found is in Morris Bright and Robert Ross’s book Fawlty Towers: Fully Booked, where Cleese is quoted as follows:

“A restaurateur by the name of Andrew Leeman was a great friend of mine and one day I asked him, “What’s the worst problem you had when you used to work at the Savoy Hotel?” Quite straight-faced he replied, “oh, the stiffs.” I said, “the what?” and he continued, “getting rid of the stiffs. The old dears knew the Savoy would always treat them really well, so they would check in with a bottle of pills, take them in the night, and in the morning the Savoy staff would walk in, pick up the phone and say, ‘We’ve got another one.’ Then the problem was getting the stiffs into the service elevator without alarming the other guests.” Well, I mean to say, once you’ve been given that as an idea, it’s just wonderful. And then you put a doctor in the hotel and it’s kind of a joy. Those ideas just write themselves. In fact, we called the dead body Mr Leeman in Andrew’s honour.”

Fawlty Towers: Fully Booked, p. 178

I have absolutely no doubt that the above is entirely true. I do not come to entirely bury this anecdote. I merely come to add some context. And that context leads – yet again – towards ITV medical sitcom Doctor in the House. Specifically, to the pilot, “Why do you want to be a Doctor?”, which Cleese wrote with Graham Chapman in 1969, a full decade before the second series of Fawlty Towers.

Why do you want to be a Doctor? title card
Upton entering the interview room

That pilot has a number of interesting things about it. From a writing point of view, Graham Chapman’s medical background was vital; a number of things in this episode turn up as tales in A Liar’s Autobiography, for instance. For me, the highlight of the episode is Upton’s horrifically awkward entrance interview for St Swithin’s:

Upton walks into the interview room. Three figures sit behind the desk. They ignore him.

UPTON: Good morning.

They continue to ignore him. Upton clears his throat and tries again.

UPTON: Good morning.

He realises, and closes his eyes.

UPTON: …afternoon.

From a technical point of view, the episode is notable for some extremely early colour OB work, rather than the usual film inserts. Indeed, the location sequences have a certain, shall we say, experimental feel to them. The series would stay with VT for its location scenes until Episode 10, “The Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever Casino”, where it switched to film for good.1

Michael Upton, on VT
A dead body being wheeled out of the hospital, on VT

On the subject of this location work, it’s notable that one of the very first things we see in the pilot is a dead body being wheeled out of the hospital. This show is not fucking about.

The pilot is interestingly structured; Part One before the break is all about Upton’s entrance interview, and Part Two is set months later, on his first day actually enrolled at St Swithin’s. And after a pathetic pep talk from the Dean, and a terrifying pep talk from Professor Loftus, we come to the gruesome finale of the episode, where Upton and his friend Duncan Waring are sent to the Preparation Room.

There, they meet the friendly Stebbings, who gives them an arm to dissect. An actual, real, arm.2

UPTON: Could we have the bag?
STEBBINGS: This is an anatomy school, not a supermarket.
UPTON: Where do we take it?
STEBBINGS: Dissection Room, Table 1. Keep the bones, but put the meat in the bin at the back.

Stebbings handing Upton an arm
Upton wandering down the corridor with the arm

Unfortunately, Upton and Waring get lost on the way to the Dissection Room. And as they accidentally wander into an antenatal class carrying the arm and cause a scene, you may begin to get more than a whiff of “The Kipper and the Corpse”, so to speak. There is an obvious parallel between Basil and Manuel trying to hide a dead body, and Upton and Waring trying to hide a disembodied arm. Still, I probably wouldn’t have bothered writing about all this if it hadn’t been for what follows.

Because in a panic, Upton and Waring go through a door, and find themselves in the street. As luck would have it, they run straight into a policeman, because of course they do.3 And when the policeman gets suspicious about exactly what’s hidden under their white coats, and goes to investigate it, he faints… and we get a striking visual which would be exactly replicated in Fawlty Towers ten years later:

A policeman lying prostrate on the floor

Why Do You Want to be a Doctor?

Miss Tibbs lying prostrate on the floor

The Kipper and the Corpse

And there we have it: an early version of some of the gags in “The Kipper and the Corpse”, a whole decade earlier than they appeared in Fawlty Towers. And proof that while John Cleese may well have been inspired by his friend who worked at the Savoy, some of the ideas in the episode had been swirling around his head long before he heard about dead bodies being smuggled out of hotels. So many different things feed into the creative process; it’s always worth remembering that a single anecdote is unlikely to be the whole story, no matter how much fun that anecdote is.

It’s also proof that there are still new things to be discovered about Fawlty Towers in 2020. You just have to know where to look for them.


  1. This colour OB work is so early, in fact, that despite being made in colour, all of Series 1 of Doctor in the House originally transmitted in black and white. Colour only came to ITV in November 1969, and even then, not all of ITV. 

  2. Well, actually, a bit of a dodgy prop. But a realistic arm might have been a little too much for the studio audience. They’re slightly unnerved as it is. 

  3. You have to allow sitcoms to get away with stuff like this. I once pinched my girlfriend’s bum while she was bending over in the car, and she accidentally honked the car horn. These things do happen. 

Read more about...

,

I’ve Covered My Website in Complete and Utter and Total Absolute Nonsense Gibberish

TV Comedy

Slightly alarmingly, it seems I have been writing for Red Dwarf fansite Ganymede & Titan for a full 16 years now. My oldest contributions there can now technically have sex with articles from a Doctor Who fansite, to produce the most unpleasant offspring you can imagine.

Still, over the years, my contributions – while definitely increasing in quality – have certainly decreased in quantity.1 So this year, I set myself the challenge of updating the site at least once a month, a feat I haven’t managed since 2007. Slightly unexpectedly, I actually managed to achieve this.

Which means over the last year, I have provided answers to the following questions:

And to round everything off, I also wrote the G&T Christmas Message for this year; our traditional address to the nation rounding up all the Red Dwarf news over the last 12 months. Until fairly recently, I could have probably just written “that silly AA advert” and had done with it, but this month saw the first of two audience recordings for a new special to be broadcast next year. Meaning there will be a whole new spate of people saying “What, I thought Red Dwarf finished years ago with that dodgy one set in prison, I didn’t know there had been new episodes since then”, despite there being literally 21 brand new episodes made and broadcast since 2009.2

Away from the wacky world of Red Dwarf3, don’t forget that the 1st January sees the 10th anniversary of a particularly stupid website called Dirty Feed. So pop over here in the New Year for a celebration of the fact that very, very occasionally, I write something which doesn’t deserve immediately throwing into a large bin.


  1. And not just because of an extended sulk in 2009 after Back to Earth

  2. It’s no secret I’m not crazy about most of the new episodes, but if you haven’t seen any of the Dave-era shows and want to dip your toe in: my personal opinion is that Lemons, The Beginning, Officer Rimmer, M-Corp and Skipper are your best bets. 

  3. Or “whacky”, if you really have to. 

Read more about...

,

Fawlty at Large, Part Four:
“Why did you laugh if you don’t understand it?”

TV Comedy

LWT logo

In the penultimate part of this series, we examined the full wrath of John Cleese. Today, to round things up, I want to investigate his softer side. The softer side that nonetheless involves a sharp jab at his fellow professionals, because this is John Cleese: the man who deliberately broadcast David Frost’s telephone number to the nation because he thought it was funny.

And a character like Mr. Davidson – someone who is the embodiment of anti-comedy – is the perfect vehicle Cleese can use to slag off some lazy jokes.

[Read more →]

Read more about...

, , ,

Fawlty at Large, Part Three:
“He doesn’t know when to stop, does he?”

TV Comedy

Mr. Davidson and Collier

Last time in our analysis of No Ill Feeling!, we took an in-depth look at Dr. Upton’s nemesis, Mr. Davidson. We are now heading towards our final showdown with that particular fragment of humanity.

It is utterly glorious. It is also utterly savage, in a way that you might not expect from a 1971 LWT sitcom. And it’s something which seems to have been pretty much ignored by everyone in their analysis of the episode – in as much as the episode has had any analysis, beyond “look, there’s an early version of Basil”.

[Read more →]

Read more about...

, , ,

Fawlty at Large, Part Two: “Join in the fun!”

TV Comedy

Mr. Davidson

In Part One of this series, we took a trip to 1971 and Doctor at Large, where newly-qualified doctor Michael Upton went to stay at the Bella Vista hotel. There, he met Mr. Clifford, our ersatz Basil Fawlty, and had a fairly baffling time with him.

That’s where most analysis of the episode No Ill Feeling! ends. But to me, it’s really just the beginning. Today, we meet the real nemesis of Michael Upton… and John Cleese.

[Read more →]

Read more about...

, , ,

Fawlty at Large, Part One: “Did you book a sprout?”

TV Comedy

Doctor Upton and Mr. Clifford, from Doctor At Large

There is a tendency, when talking about TV shows, to get caught up in the same old anecdotes and stock opinions.

Star Trek: The Next Generation only got good with Season 3. Panorama was briefly interesting in 1957 with its spaghetti harvest April Fools, and again that time when Dimbleby sat there like a twat when no films would run. Catchphrase is reduced to Mr. Chips having a wank next to a snake.

It’s the same with sitcoms. Hancock is all about armfuls of blood and reading off cue cards. Are You Being Served? is entirely centred on Mrs. Slocombe’s minge. The Office invented a whole new way of making comedy.1 So it is with Fawlty Towers, which has its own set of anecdotes and origin stories, all endlessly repeated over the years until nobody bothers to question them.

So let’s question one of them, shall we?

[Read more →]


  1. It didn’t. 

Read more about...

, , ,

Deviance.

Internet / TV Comedy

Currently, I’m going through a load of old Dirty Feed articles, for preparation for the site’s 10th anniversary in January.1 And this particular piece about the now-dormant Dirty Feed Tumblr caught my eye.

There is no polite way of saying this. The most popular post I ever made on Tumblr was a collection of pulp book covers featuring women about to have sex with dogs.

Now, you may not be particularly keen on my bestiality material. You may prefer my in-depth articles about sitcom edits instead. But it was definitely the most popular post I ever made on Tumblr, by an order of magnitude. I mention over 200 likes/reblogs in that previous piece; it had over 400 before it was removed.

Removed? Ah, yes. Sadly, that post is no longer available, due to Tumblr’s porn ban in December 2018. As soon as that ban was announced, I stopped using the site. I never really clicked with Tumblr anyway; the porn ban was the final straw.

But the fact remains: by far the most thing I ever posted on the site was deleted by Tumblr. That’s a mildly annoying state of affairs, even if I’m not using the site any more, and even if the post did feature an illustration of an Alsatian with a particularly lascivious look on his face.

*   *   *

OK, fine. If you want an article on sitcom edits, let’s talk about some sitcom edits.2

Back in 2012, I wrote a series of articles on pre-watershed edits made to Red Dwarf on Dave. One recurring motif presented itself: time and time again, some of the funniest moments in an episode were cut.3 Kryten sticking up his finger and saying “Swivel on it, punk!”; “Rimmer Directive 271 states just as clearly: No chance you metal bastard”; “Santa Claus – what a bastard! He’s just a big fat git who sneaks down chimneys and steals all the kid’s favorite toys…”; “No officer with false teeth should attempt oral sex in zero gravity”; “Men! They’re all bastards!”; and by the funniest moment in Red Dwarf VIII:

CASSANDRA: I already told you: Rimmer dies of a heart attack, and then you and all the other Canaries die too; all except Lister, Kryten, Kochanski and the Cat. I’ve seen it.
RIMMER: That’s as well as maybe, but have you seen this?

RIMMER flips his middle finger to CASSANDRA, then turns and storms out.

CASSANDRA: Yes, I’m afraid I have.

My analysis of pre-watershed I’m Alan Partridge edits brought up similar points: “Don’t rub your fanny on me!” and “He means his cock!” were gone. And if I ever get round to writing something about pre-watershed Porridge edits on Gold, I’ll be sure to mention that the climax to the episode where Fletch sticks two fingers up to the camera is pixellated, destroying the joke entirely.

*   *   *

This isn’t really an anti-censorship screed, at least not per se. My point is simply this: when things are deleted from the internet, or cuts are made to programmes, it’s worth remembering that the effect of such things isn’t random. It’s not arbitrary chunks that disappear: it’s the outliers that go. The rudest joke in a sitcom episode; a blog post which takes a left turn into filth. And those outliers are often one of the most popular parts of a piece of work.

And slowly but surely, the corners of things get knocked off. Censorship is often talked about – sometimes correctly, sometimes not – in terms of how dangerous it can be. But often, the enemy is the sheer blandification of pop culture. It’s not that anybody dies. It’s not about suppressing important conversations. It’s about which bits of our culture survive in the popular memory, and which don’t. Which is both very important, and not important at all.

And that leads to one of the joys of owning your own little part of the internet. Away from social media giants changing their policies on a whim, and away from UKTV’s bizarre editing policies, you can quietly sit and document things. And documenting these things shifts the power dynamic back towards the integrity of the text, however slightly, rather than companies just doing things because it’s easier. I find it immensely rewarding.

Especially when – just occasionally – you get to stand up for an author’s original intention, when it never managed to make it to the screen properly in the first place.

Though that’s not as important as dog cock, obviously.


  1. Come on, like I’m going to be able to resist writing something appallingly self-important for it. 

  2. “Others may wish to skip on to the last chapter which is a good bit and has Marvin in it.” 

  3. Bizarrely, not the rhythmic thrusting of Kryten and Lister in Polymorph. 

Read more about...

Padded. Unspectacular. Filler.

Animation / TV Comedy

There are some things I will never understand.

Take, for instance, this Amazon review of Soupy Twists!, Jem Roberts’ excellent look at Fry & Laurie:

“As seems to be the norm now, about a third of the book is padded out with unused snippets of sketches (although I recognised some so that might be quite a loose definition).”

Or how about this SFX review of The Hidden Art of Disney’s Golden Age?

“Generally, though, this is an unspectacular volume. It’s full of doodles and drawings which reveal their artists’ technique and imagination without being very eye-catching; many are for toons that were never made. For example, several pages are devoted to the abandoned “Mickey’s Sea Monster”, with loads of design ideas for a Disney sea serpent (the best monsters are cute but also a bit scary). There are glimpses of an unmade Fantasia-like cartoon called Japanese Symphony, with parasol-wielding geishas and dancing butterflies.”

Or how about the review I distinctly remember of a Red Dwarf DVD, which called the deleted scenes “filler”? (Sadly, I can’t find that particular review, or the police might have to investigate a sudden nasty spate of poison pen letters.)

Regardless: I will never understand it. I will never understand somebody lifting up the lid on the creative process, to see a glimpse of what could have been… only to be greeted with calls that it’s padding, unspectacular, or filler. Of course, sometimes such work can be worthwhile in its own right; for what it’s worth, I was hooting with laughter at the unused Fry & Laurie stuff. “Split beaver pornography slipped through the net.”

But sometimes, it’s not about whether the work itself is entertaining. The path not taken is one of the biggest insights you can have into how something was made. If you ever thought the end of the Red Dwarf episode “Dimension Jump” was anti-climactic… just look at the deleted scenes, and see just how much worse it could have been, and how they arrived at the ending they did.

I know people engage with work in different ways. There are many who just don’t care about going behind-the-scenes at all. And that’s fine. But if you’re reading a book about Fry & Laurie rather than just watching the programmes again; if you’re reviewing a book specifically about Disney’s “Hidden Art” rather than just watching the cartoons; if you’ve wandered away from watching the episodes on a Red Dwarf release and into the extras menu… then I have to assume that you care about more than just watching the finished products themselves, and you want to go deeper.

So to shrug your shoulders at this stuff is frankly baffling. The chance to see brand new unseen work from people you love… or the chance to understand why you love them in the first place. Both approaches are valid for unseen material.

But indifference, or even boredom? That’s just weird.

Read more about...

Beyond Grace Brothers

TV Comedy

Mrs. Slocombe, Mr. Humphries and Miss Brahms as backing singers

Something very odd happens in Episode 54 of Are You Being Served?, you know. Something which has never happened before.

Mind you, Series 8 of the show had already seen its fair share of upheaval. We wave goodbye to Mr. Goldberg, see in Mr. Grossman… then four episodes in, wave goodbye to Mr. Grossman and say hello to Mr. Klein, turning the Men’s department into a full-on ridiculous revolving door situation. We also say goodbye to Mr. Lucas, who admittedly had been lessening in importance for years, but was our original audience identification figure in the show’s early days. In his place comes the enormous waste of time and space which is Mr. Spooner.1 Finally, Young Mr. Grace disappears – he briefly returns for the 1981 Christmas special, but that’s it – and hands over the reins to Old Mr. Grace, who somehow manages to be even more of a creepy fucker than his predecessor.

Elsewhere, there are signs that the show itself is getting restless. While Croft displayed a taste for expanding the scope of his other sitcoms – with perhaps a few rickety film sequences too many in Dad’s Army and the like – for the first seven series, Are You Being Served? stayed resolutely within the walls of the Grace Brothers department store.2 Most of the action takes place on the shop floor of the Ladies and Gentlemen’s departments, the canteen, or an office. Occasionally they might sneak into the boardroom, and the show took the odd trip to other departments – most memorably in Series 5’s “A Change Is as Good as a Rest”, where they all go and work in the Toy Department for a week. But we never, ever go outside the building. Grace Brothers is all we ever see.

[Read more →]


  1. I know there will be Mr. Spooner fans reading this. Sorry. *pulls that face Mr. Spooner pulls* 

  2. Ignore the film. In every respect. 

Read more about...

,

KYTV: Challenge Anna
(TRANSLATED AND DUBBED BY DIRTY FEED)

TV Comedy

Our two heroes

I remember the very first time I ever became aware of KYTV.

It wasn’t through actually watching it, like a normal person. That would be too easy. No, it was reading a rather snotty reference to it in What Satellite magazine, where some idiot columnist made some outraged remark about the BBC making fun of their precious satellite television while forcing everyone to pay the licence fee. It was a remark which, if Geoffrey Perkins or Angus Deayton had read it, I suspect would have filled them with glee. Irritating various people who deserve to be irritated is entirely within the remit KYTV had set itself, after all.

In any case, it’s easy to accuse the columnist of over-sensitivity. “A parody of cheap satellite TV” might be part of what KYTV is doing, but it most certainly isn’t all of it. If that was true, then for a start, they wouldn’t have been able to reuse so much material from the show’s radio predecessor, Radio Active. No, the targets KYTV had in its sights were fairly scattershot. For every joke about dishy dish girls, there’s another about BBC2 theme nights. And for every joke satirising cheap and exploitative TV, there are jokes which aren’t much about TV at all. You could stick Martin Brown in any environment, and he’d be funny.1

Which brings us to Challenge Anna: the last episode of Series 1 of KYTV, the best episode of the show made up until that point, and up there with the best full stop. In the programme’s sights are Challenge Anneka – a BBC show – and Treasure Hunt – a Channel 4 show. Indeed, neither programme is the kind of thing which Sky or BSB could really afford to make in 1990. And while the feature “Spin the Wheel” could be viewed as what could happen to the formats if dirty old Sky got hold of them, jokes about companies helping out on the show in order to get their name mentioned are very much digs at the Beeb.

Sadly, KYTV has fallen down the cracks of comedy history somewhat – more, in fact, than Radio Active itself, which has had an ongoing successful stage revival, and this year is up in Edinburgh for the team’s 40th anniversary. So let’s redress the balance. With many thanks to Darrell Maclaine-Jones, I have in my possession the script for Challenge Anna. And contained within are all kinds of differences to the broadcast episode – with whole scenes included which didn’t make the final cut.

Let’s take a look, shall we?

[Read more →]


  1. As my partner has just pointed out to me: “He’s basically Hennimore, isn’t he?” 

Read more about...

, ,