1. INT. John’s Gmail Account. Night.
A mess, obviously. Unopened mail everywhere. It is ignored, as ‘Compose Mail’ is clicked, and a flurry of text appears on the screen.
I’d just like to leave a quick note with the site’s readers as I retire my activity at NTS: thank you for everything; you’ve been great. It’s been an excellent two years and I still think that, however small, the community around here is one of the most-rewarding to write for on the internet.
For now, however, I will be focusing my efforts in other areas. Good luck to everybody in the new year, and thanks again. For everything.
Just a quick note to wish all of our readers out there a happy holiday season, whichever holiday (or holidays…if you’re smart you’ll reach for the plurality) you may choose to celebrate. It’s a pleasure, as always, bringing you breaking news of video-game playthroughs, and up to the minute reviews of programs that ended years ago.
We thank our thousands of daily visitors and our six regular commenters for their continuing support. We love you, in a way.
Merry Christmas, everyone.
PS — Thanks for the wings!
Turns out the parrot sketch is even more historically important than we thought.
“Some of the jokes are strikingly similar to modern ones, with subjects including farts, sex, ugly wives and a dimwit referred to as ‘a student dunce’.”
Heh – farts.
“A student dunce is voyaging on a very stormy sea. When his slaves start to wail, he tells them, ‘Don’t cry: in my will, I’ve set you all free!’”
Still, it’s all in the delivery, right? Check ‘em out as told by Jim Bowen.
Erm, hello. Sorry if you came by earlier today and saw the old site in all its “glory” - we’re still trying to figure out what happened, but blah blah DNS blah blah not our fault blah blah server configuration issue blah blah.
We’re back now, though, and it shouldn’t happen again. Now sod off out of it.
Erm, hello. Look what we did. Movable Type is… you know what, I’m sick of saying that. WHAT DO YOU WANT?
Hello all. Just to let you know that we've had to shut off comments for the time being, due to. them... erm, causing the server to fall over.
Don't ask.
We've got a solution in hand, however - just give us a few days to get it sorted, and you'll be able to call us a bunch of fucking cunts again in no time.
UPDATE: Now fixed!
Really captures the frustration of a Sunday, doesn't it?
You know, it's been a shit few months for NTS really. Bad Gateway errors. Stupid problems with the front page. And worst of all - nasty viruses.
So. Hello again. For the full story of why we went offline, see this G&T post - it's the same for both sites. Have a read if it if you haven't already, and then come back here. (Short version: we're now clean of viruses, and it wasn't our fault.) But whilst I used that post to complain about our hosting company did wrong - what about what we did wrong?
You may have noticed that this site was down on Friday evening. This is because we've been having reports that NTS was infected with the VBS/Psyme trojan. This exploits an Internet Explorer-only vunerability.
I've given the site a complete going-over, including a thorough virus scan, and I can see no infection at all. I'm therefore 99.9% confident that this is simply a case of false positives.
Just to let you know that if you've been experiencing problems with the front page loading on NTS, that this has now been fixed. Hooray for me.
Also, due to what's happening with G&T, NTS might be a bit quiet for a few days until the new site up. It's unlikely to slow down completely though, as not everyone here is pathetically Dwarf-obsessed.
That is all.
Just a quick note to any NTS readers who are also LiveJournal users, to the effect that our syndicated LJ feed - which has been Broke and Rubbish ever since we relaunched the site - is now fully working and operational again. So if you want to get NTS updates on your Friends List, you can find the syndication feed here.
Just a quick note to apologise for the amount of downtime for our sister sites, Ganymede & Titan, Observation Dome, and Flange Log at the moment. We're trying to sort out the problem. No idea why we're getting Bad Gateway errors at present.
Note that G&T is currently half-asleep at the moment anyway - me and Ian are taking a bit of time out to concentrate on the redesign. More soon, with any luck - it should be pretty big...
Erm, hello. Look what we did. Black is so last year, darlings.
Yes, we're back, and with a site that (hopefully) actually works. Take a look around, see if you like it, and tell us what you think. Any suggestions of what could be better are more than welcome - it's obviously a complex site trying to cram a lot of stuff in, so we're bound to get a few things wrong to start with.
Right, we're off!
Only for this week, though. If all goes according to plan, next weekend a brand new Noise To Signal will be launching. One that will hopefully be a pleasure to read, rather than this... MESS.
In the meantime, commenting has been disabled, so we can get the new site ready without worrying about new comments being transferred across. See you soon!
Hello there. Look what we've made.
Welcome to a new kind of website. Or, more correctly: the same kind of website you see everywhere else on the net, but with even less focus. Because we intend to cover every media imaginable, with reviews, articles, and general crap right here in the blog. Can you stand the excitement? Clue: yes.