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The Teaching Room

TV Comedy

Welcome back to yet another article where I look at Red Dwarf‘s sets in mind-numbing and excoriating detail. And having already recently investigated some thrilling wall sections and the Captain’s Office, we turn to what might initially seem an unpromising avenue for spectacular revelations: the Teaching Room in Series 1.

I think, however, you may be surprised. Because telling the story of this set leads us into some rather interesting areas which I don’t think have been examined before. As ever, we don’t have the paperwork handy to be able to check any of this: we have to do some deduction, some guesswork, and leave some questions unanswered.

With that health warning, let’s take another trip through early Red Dwarf – as ever with these articles, in order of recording rather than broadcast.

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The Captain’s Office

TV Comedy

Hello everyone. Last time in the crazy world of Red Dwarf set analysis, we took a look at the history of three wall sections used at BBC Manchester in 1988. (You need to have read that to have a hope of following this piece.) How could I possibly top that majestic piece of writing?

Answer: with one of Series 1’s most famous oddities. Yes, it’s the disappearing and reappearing Captain’s Office. This article was intended to be a more general look at the Drive Room set, but believe it or not I have found enough to say about this single topic to make a full standalone piece. I am not dumbing down my material. It’s always been this stupid.

As before, we need to take this one in recording order, rather than broadcast order.

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From Supply Pipe 28 to Floor 592

TV Comedy

Over the last few years, I’ve posted many pieces on Dirty Feed analysing Red Dwarf‘s sets, including obscure wall panels, a piece of set which survived the first eight series, and… doorways. But this article, first published on Ganymede & Titan in September 2018. was the very beginning of my research into this ridiculous topic.

It’s been significantly revised in a number of places, not least the ending, which has some EXCITING REVELATIONS I’ve never written about before. So if you read it all those years ago and enjoyed it, this version might actually be worth another peek. I always feel old G&T stuff never quite fits in correctly here, even after rewrites; my writing style has just changed too much in the intervening years. But this piece was an “important” step in my love of researching all this nonsense, and feels like it deserves a home here.

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When I say to random people “Hey, what do you remember about the sets of the first two series of Red Dwarf?”, they back away from me and look for the nearest exit. Before they manage to escape, however, they usually mention the bunkroom. They might stammer out an anecdote about a yellow banana adding colour to the set in Series 2. Really cool people might mention how the Drive Room changes between series, or how the Observation Dome is a perfect combination of live set elements and special effects.

Still, all those stories have been told. I want to dig a little deeper, and I don’t care how boring things get in order to do so. With that in mind, I proudly present: a history of three wall sections, used at BBC Manchester in 1987-88.

Enjoy.

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You Stupid Ugly Goit

Radio Comedy / TV Comedy

Close-up of a pixellated Holly

The origins of Red Dwarf are oft-told. Radio 4 sketch show, Son of Cliché, Dave Hollins, job done, right?

And true, one of the first sparks of life of something which turned into Red Dwarf appeared on Radio 4 on the 30th August 1983, with the very first sketch of Dave Hollins: Space Cadet.1


Download “Dave Hollins: Space Cadet – The Strange Planet You Shouldn’t Really Land On” (MP3, 3:41)

Nick Maloney’s corpsing at the end of that sketch is brilliant.

Still, Dave Hollins wasn’t a running sketch in that first series of Son of Cliché. We’d have to wait until the following year for that privilege. And when it did come back, on the 10th November 1984, I would argue that it was as something far more recognisable as Red Dwarf.


Download “Dave Hollins: Space Cadet – Norweb” (MP3, 3:35)

“Jan Vogels” in the first sketch did nearly made it into Red Dwarf – most notably, a far shorter version is present in the US pilot (“You know a guy called Harry Johnson?”).2 But that second Dave Hollins sketch is stuffed with ideas which later found a home in actual, broadcast Dwarf.

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  1. The research for Son of Cliché in this article comes almost entirely from material written in 2003 by Ian Symes, on an early incarnation of Red Dwarf fansite Ganymede & Titan. It’s a measure of how well that research was done that it hasn’t yet been surpassed as reference material for the series. 

  2. The 2007 Red Dwarf DVD release The Bodysnatcher Collection also includes a never-shot version of the sketch, recreated using storyboards. 

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Broken Dreams

TV Comedy

Discussing the influences and antecedents of Red Dwarf can be tricky. Do we look at the show in terms of its science fiction, or as a sitcom?

In terms of science fiction, albeit comic science fiction, Dark Star is the big one. The idea of having normal people rather than heroes, and in particular its portrayal of working class people in space, seems to have originated here for Grant Naylor. Alien also feeds into this, along with influencing many sets in the show, not to mention all the shenanigans in “Polymorph”. Holly clearly has his roots in HAL from 2001: A Space Odyssey1, and so does the first opening theme tune.

As for pure sitcom, there’s the classic “Steptoe and Son in space”, which is often thrown around as an early concept for the show. Porridge is also endlessly mentioned, in terms of the claustrophobic situation between characters which the show was trying to evoke. All of this is certainly true, but with the odd honourable exception, there’s typically very little analysis beyond mentioning a TV show or film, along with a one line description.

And then there’s Hancock’s Half Hour. A show which doesn’t immediately spring to mind when talking about Red Dwarf. Yet the episode “The Tycoon” (TX: 13/11/59) has a number of remarkable similarities to the Red Dwarf episode “Better Than Life” (TX: 13/9/88), broadcast nearly thirty years later. Moreover, I don’t just mean in terms of character work – the main plot beats of the episode are broadly identical, despite “Better Than Life” seemingly hanging off a science fiction idea which Hancock would find impossible to replicate.

Hancock's Half Hour title card
Red Dwarf title card


Rather than vague hand-waving or simplistic single line reductions, let’s take a look at both episodes in detail, shall we?

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  1. A fact made more obvious by looking at Red Dwarf‘s precursor “Dave Hollins: Space Cadet” in Radio 4’s Son of Cliché, featuring… Hab. 

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Better Than Reality

TV Comedy

“I alter people’s perception of reality.” – Dr. Hypnosis

One recurring theme in Red Dwarf has always been the rather tenuous grip on real life the crew have. Whether it’s the Total Immersion Videogame of “Better Than Life”, the hallucinations suffered in “Back to Reality”, those damn reality pockets in “Out of Time” – to name three of many – people’s perception of reality is something which Grant Naylor return to time and time again.

What’s interesting, however, is that Red Dwarf is far from the first time Grant Naylor have explored this idea. In fact, we can trace their fascination with it right back to their very first solo writing credit: the first episode of Radio 4 sketch show Cliché, broadcast on the 16th March 1981. Though unlike Red Dwarf, it isn’t framed in terms of science fiction.

I present to you the strange adventure of Dr. Hypnosis: his real name… Dr. Hypnosis.

Download “Cliché – Dr. Hypnosis”

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A Short Note About Old G&T Articles

Meta

Least promising headline on Dirty Feed ever, amongst some stiff competition, I know. Dirty Feed editorial policy is an even more niche subject than Hale & Pace fan fiction. But I do know there will be a few people wondering about it. Consider this a boring publishing note that most people can skip, and read something more interesting instead.

So: recently, I’ve started publishing a few posts on here which I originally wrote for Red Dwarf fansite Ganymede & Titan, which I departed from back in January. I thought I’d give a little explanation as to my choices, because republishing my old shit has never been this site’s modus operandi before. (It’s always been about publishing my new shit.) But as I said at the start of the year, I do like the idea of some of my work from G&T having a home here too, especially given that it’s the perfect chance to revise and improve a few things.

Still, some of the stuff I’ve chosen to republish over here so far isn’t exactly the obvious stuff you’d think I might pick. So here’s my thinking behind it all, for those who care.

Obviously, plenty of stuff I wrote over on G&T just isn’t Dirty Feed material. For a start, I published literally hundreds of news articles over the years, which actually consisted of the bulk of my writing – precisely none of which are worth reviving here. Pieces on the imminent transmission of The Crouches aren’t something which need to pop up on Dirty Feed in 2020.1

Then there’s the longer, but still time-sensitive articles, such as my review of The Bodysnatcher Collection DVD back in 2007. I love that they are still available online, and hope they always will be, but I don’t see any point in throwing them across to here. They capture a particular point in time, that a 2020 date attached would entirely destroy.

Finally in terms of stuff that won’t come over here, there’s the old jointly-written articles, like this piece on the climax to Red Dwarf VI. I honestly can’t remember who wrote what in those pieces – in the early days, it was often a Lennon/McCartney situation2 – but that’s all the more reason not to publish them on Dirty Feed.

So, what of stuff that is likely to find its way over here? Currently, it’s the shorter material being revised and republished, especially stuff written over the past couple of years that I still actually like. Pieces about the early satellite repeats of Red Dwarf fit neatly into the kind of thing I already publish over here, for instance.3

Then there’s the bigger pieces. Stuff like my old Hancock’s Half Hour article are thoroughly Dirty Feed material, and you’d think they would be the first things to make their way across over to here. The reason they haven’t so far is simple: I want to do a proper job at revising them to make a little more sense outside a fandom context, and that takes time. Then there’s my analysis of the sets in Series 1 and 2 of Red Dwarf, which I abandoned after three posts. That needs finishing off, but it’s a big project that really needs proper time setting aside for. It’ll happen eventually.

And finally, there are the old articles which are revised so much that I haven’t even bothered acknowledging their roots in old G&T pieces. For instance, the piece I wrote on here last month about a character-defining joke in Red Dwarf was initially inspired by a G&T piece from 2017, on an old Grant Naylor radio sitcom. But there are so many additions and changes in the Dirty Feed article – the first two-thirds are brand new, for instance – that it’s not really a rewrite of an old piece any more, and so doesn’t get labelled as such.

So there you go. Boring, but if you were confused as to the slightly-strange-from-the-outside republishing policy, then there’s your explanation. I’m not interested in porting over every single piece of writing I’ve ever done about Red Dwarf to here – anything I publish I want to reflect what I think about things today. After all, there are plenty of old articles which aren’t time-sensitive, and you’d think would make a decent post on here… but after ten years, I have decided are actually complete and utter bollocks. No point dragging out my ill-thought-through pieces about how whatever the faults of a piece of comedy, “it doesn’t matter as long as its funny”.4

Now, let’s forget about Red Dwarf for a bit. Who fancies something about Doctor on the Go instead?


  1. I do like the headline, though. 

  2. Yes, I’m afraid I actually did just make that comparison. 

  3. The revising takes two forms, incidentally. The first is to mainly strip the pieces of fandom in-jokes which wouldn’t really work over here. The second is proper improvements to the material. This piece on an old Night Network show adds some research involving TV listings which really should have been part of the original G&T version, but I was lazy. 

  4. This is one trap I fell into time and time again in old pieces of writing about comedy: segregating off “comedy” and “everything else”. Which is nonsense. Everything feeds into whether something is funny or not. A lot of my early writing about comedy is me splashing around, desperately trying to come up with something worth putting on the page… and failing. 

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Pillow Talk on Night Network

TV Comedy

This year on Dirty Feed, I’ve talked about identifying the dates of some of my early TV memories.

Here’s a little tale about identifying the date of somebody else’s.

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Long before Paula Yates invited people On the Bed, Emma Freud was doing the same on Pillow Talk, part of ITV’s late night programming Night Network.1 And who did she have on the bed in 1987? None other than a certain Chris Barrie, who spends much of the interview looking fairly uncomfortable. They should have just had sex in multiple different positions and had done with it.

A few things to ponder, then, before I reveal the real MEAT of what has turned out to be a rather remarkable little time capsule.

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  1. For a far more detailed discussion of ITV’s late night efforts, you should listen to this podcast by Jaffa Cakes for Proust, which is truly excellent. 

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Gold Digging

TV Comedy

It’s odd, the things you assume, with absolutely zero evidence whatsoever.

Take Red Dwarf repeats, for example. Over the years I’ve written countless stupid articles about the show. But one thing I never got round to is a full list of repeats Dwarf has had over the years. So if you want that, you should read Christopher Wickham’s excellent The Red Dwarf BBC Broadcasts Guide.1

Still, one self-confessed omission from that article is anything to do with cable/satellite repeats and the like. I don’t intend to provide a full list of these, because while I might be a moron, I am not an absolute fucking moron. It seems worth asking one question, however: when was the first repeat of Red Dwarf in the UK which was not on the BBC?

Before researching this post, my massively naive guess was: around 1992. UK Gold launched on the 1st November of that year; I’d just assumed that repeats of Red Dwarf had been part of the channel from the very beginning. But then, I never had access to the channel back when it started; the first time I ever experienced the wonders of multichannel television was in the late 90s, when we got NTL analogue cable, and even then we couldn’t afford any of the extra pay channels. Instead, I whiled away my days cheating the receiver into giving me 10 minutes of free Television X. Believe me, when you’re 18, 10 minutes is all you need.

Anyway, there is a very easy way of telling when Red Dwarf was first shown on UK Gold, and it doesn’t involve doing any hard research. Just ask people on Twitter, and get them to do that hard work for you. And here is the answer from Jonathan Dent, cross-referencing the Guardian’s TV listings and this Usenet post. The repeats of Dwarf on UK Gold started with a double-bill of “The End” and “Future Echoes”, and premiered on the Sunday 5th October 1997 at 11:05pm.

UK Gold schedule for first showing of Red Dwarf

That’s a bloody great day of telly, isn’t it? But I digress.

What I find especially interesting about all this is that it coincides with the 1997 resurgence of Red Dwarf, which started with the first broadcast of Series VII 10 months previously, along with the programme’s first Radio Times cover. A resurgence which I look back on with mixed feelings, to say the least – but very much part of the second wave of the show and its fandom. Being someone who got into Red Dwarf during the 1994 BBC2 repeat season, I had no idea that I was already watching the show before it got its very first non-terrestrial UK showing. These repeats are all so much later than the history I had made up entirely by myself in my own head.

Now, would it be too much to hope for that this first broadcast on UK Gold was captured by someone on video? Maybe even with the accompanying – and presumably quite excitable – continuity announcement?

A version of this post was first published on Ganymede & Titan in September 2019.


  1. In fact, you should read his blog Ludicrously Niche regardless. TV edits, gamebook analysis, and Radio Times capsules, who could want anything more from the internet? 

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Emohawk: Covington Cross II

TV Comedy

“The Red Dwarf sets have been built on Stage G at Shepperton Studios, home of countless films and television projects, including The Third Man, Oliver!, Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves and Mel Gibson’s Hamlet, for the past three seasons. Scattered amongst the workshops and sound stages at Shepperton are a number of disused backlots, which have proved to be a bonanza for the Red Dwarf production team. This year, they’ve already returned to the wooded glade used in last season’s ‘Terrorform’ to shoot exteriors for episode four, ‘Rimmerworld’, and next week they’ll be shooting segments of episode five, ‘Emohawk’, in a village of wooden huts – a set left behind by the short-lived American series Covington Cross.”

The Making of Red Dwarf, Joe Nazzaro, p. 17 (published 1994)

“The GELF settlement was a re-dressed medieval village set which had been created for the aborted British/American television series Covington Cross.”

“Emohawk: Polymorph II” Wikipedia entry (retrieved October 2020)

Any self-respecting Red Dwarf fan has a few standard facts at their disposal. The first recording dates for Series 1 were cancelled due to an electrician’s strike. Robert Llewellyn was electrocuted on his first day at work. “Meltdown” was put back in the episode order due to worries about the Gulf War.

Slotting in among these standard set of facts is that the village scenes in the episode “Emohawk: Polymorph II” were shot on an abandoned set for a series called Covington Cross. And that’s… kinda it. That is The Fact, done, ticked, off we go.

I don’t think that’s good enough. Let’s take a proper look.

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